June 2019: Right After

One of my parents' neighbors, and a family friend, has a couple of airplanes and a pilot's license. He's pretty close to my brother Cal, and has taken Cal flying several times. Cal's good friend and high school buddy, David, who is also a pilot, was in town for Dad's funeral, and somehow, between our friend with the planes (Clark), David, and Cal, arrangements were made to go flying the night of Dad's funeral. Cal really wanted to take Michael, and I was invited along, but since I'd been mentally AWOL for so many days, I thought it would be better for Brian to go with Michael instead of me. 

And this is where I turn the narrative over to Brian. 

It was perfect the day of the funeral to get out of the house and especially to give Michael something fun to do that he loved just as much as he thought he would. Clark has a few planes, and he took us up in this white one first (literally everyone else who went would know what kind of plane it was, just not me). Due to the small size, it could only take a few people, so we had to take turns.

Clark and David gave Michael a little lesson about the planes and the components on the control panel. Michael knew quite a few of them, but it was great to see him soak everything up about it.

McCallan and Cassidy went up first with Clark while Michael and I hung out with David and got to know him. We grilled him on training school and what it took to become a pilot and a trainer (which he now is).

This little plane could only fit two people, so we never went up in it, although Michael asked about every 5 minutes if he could go up in it.

Michael was like a little school kid (mostly because he is) in the plane. I sat in the backseat and he was in the front, so it was a shame I didn't get to see the huge grin he had plastered on his face the whole time. Clark had radios that we could use to talk to each other without the plane drowning us out. At one point, we even did some dives to simulate no gravity. It was almost like filming Apollo 13, except for ... most everything. But we did make a book fly from the front of the plane to the back.

After the flight, Michael waited very, very impatiently for the plane to come back, hoping for just one more chance to fly again.

We flew over Swan Valley, over Devri's mom's house, and everywhere in between. Idaho really is beautiful, if I might say so myself. I was so grateful that McCallan arranged this, we all needed a distraction from what had just happened. Michael really needed it most of all.

Back to Devri:

I'm so grateful to my brother and to Clark for taking Michael up in the air for a much needed distraction. Of all my kids, he took Dad's death the hardest. He often called Dad (his grandpa) his best friend. They had an incredibly special bond.

After our unexpected weeklong trip to Idaho, we finally made it home. And I sat in the chair in my room, looked at the bag that needed to be unpacked, and I just did none of it. I cried. I might have even read a book. I was spent, and just grateful to have this dog up on my bed keeping a comforting vigil on me as I hid from the world for a little bit.

 I mentioned that Brian's boss sent us flowers after we got home. They were so lovely and I was so touched.

 Right after we got home, we found the pictures from Dad's funeral program taped up onto Michael's cork board in his room, and it about broke our hearts all over again.

 Our good college friends kept us fueled with this beautiful edible arrangement. Their kindness and thoughtfulness is still warming my heart as I think about it.

In all our trials and griefs, the Lord promises that He will not leave us comfortless. I had so many friends reach out to ask if I wanted to go for a walk and just talk. A friend that lost her dad at the age of 9 touched base with me almost everyday. I was amazed at how in tune all these people were to be able to bring the Savior's promised comfort. They were never offended when I said I wasn't up for a walk. They didn't mind the tears when they came or the streams of consciousness as I reminisced about my dad and the events of his passing. I learned so much about what it means to mourn with those that mourn, what to do and what not to do. All too often, we want to step in and fix things, and I so appreciated my many friends who knew that this couldn't be fixed and were so supportive of me in my grief.