We even have a video that the local news had put together featuring me (and several other kids) that we affectionately call "The Devri Movie." It's really great. Someday, I'll make it digital so that you can watch it ;) I was in a body cast for 12 weeks after my surgery and then a brace after that.
Not too long after my surgery and recovery, we moved from Boise to Ririe, but once a year after my surgery, I would go to Boise with my parents for a check-up at St. Luke's. I'd lay on a big table for x-rays, and then meet with the doctor. We'd usually go on our way to the Linville Family Reunion in Oregon each August. One appointment, my parent's were so excited to hear that we'd only have to come back every other year. I got to pick a toy at the store after that appointment--and I was the only one who got anything! I felt so cool.
Soon these trips turned into something I just did with my Mom. Somewhere between middle school and high school, my doctor said that my hip was great and we didn't need to worry about coming back. I think he was getting ready to retire, so the trips to Boise were really unnecessary, and we stopped going. It was another milestone on my hip journey.
Around the age of 19, my hip started getting achy when it was really cold out or if I'd been on my feet all day. I expected this; I'd heard from the doctor that I might end up with arthritis in that hip. I just didn't expect the trouble to start so soon. But, the achiness was no big deal. I just put a heating pad on it after a long day and joked about how I was turning into an old lady at 19!
Well, starting this last July, my hip started popping and crunching occasionally when I'm walking. It hurts really bad, but only for a minute. Then, it resettles and I continue on as if nothing had happened. When we were walking around Old Faithful this summer with Brian's family, it popped/crunched 4 or 5 times. And it made me start worrying. But not enough to do anything about it, even though my hip did it more consistently with each passing month.
When I started really training for the Cougar Run, it started happening more and more. The week before the race, my hip was really hurting to the point that I looked up a doctor, picked up the phone, and set up an appointment. That appointment was yesterday.
For the first time in over 15 years, I found myself in an orthopedic surgeon's office. I laid on the table to get x-rays as memories flooded my mind. It was a different office, but so familiar. It was cooler this time because I got to show Michael the x-ray and explain about a ball and socket joint. I'd been looking at hip x-rays since I was his age.
The doctor came in and said, "Well, it's a good thing we know you have a history of hip displacement because that helps us understand what's going on with your hip." My right hip--the good one--is perfectly shaped. The ball on the top of the femur is nice and rounded. My left hip--not so much. My left ball is shaped more like a football instead of a soccer ball, and it is not smooth at all. Lots of little bumps. The good news is that I still have lots of good cartilage in my hip. He said that right now I have two options--I can take anti-inflammatory drugs every day or get a steroid shot. But, I will probably need a hip replacement at some point. I tried to get him to guess at when. He said he couldn't say. Hopefully, it will be decades down the road, but it could also be just a few years. He basically told me I need to stay healthy so that my body will be ready for when I do need the hip replacement. He told me to avoid high-impact exercises. I asked about running. He made a pained face and said, "I hate telling anyone they can't go running. I love running. But if you want to have your hip last longer, you should probably avoid running."
I left the office feeling pretty bummed. I felt old. I kept saying to myself, "I'm only 29! I can't believe we're talking about hip replacement already!" And I left with a determination to be ready for when that day comes, and doing my best to keep that day as far into the future as possible.
That means that as of yesterday at noon, I officially gave up running.
It's funny that six months ago, I would have been happy to have a legit excuse not to go running, but yesterday, I felt like a door was slammed in my face. Saturday's Cougar Run was my last race. Ever. I'm so grateful Brian let me just go for it. He must have been inspired. Yesterday was a sad, sad day for me. Today is a little better, but I'm pretty sad and tears come whenever I think about it. I was just getting my endurance back. I was excited about my progress. I was loving running again, something that hasn't happened since high school. Brian and I were planning when our next race would be. I'm pretty devastated.
I talked to my mom last night and told her all about it. She's been with me on this hip journey from the beginning, and she understands all the implications even better than I do. I cried and cried as she listened over the phone. And she told me that hip replacements have really come a long way, and it wouldn't be so bad if it had to be replaced. I needed to hear that, because when I think of hip replacements, I think of old ladies and walkers.
I know that I have much to be thankful for, and I am. I'm so grateful for modern medicine that has gotten me this far. Until now, this hip condition of mine has not slowed me down or limited me at all (except for some flexibility issues). Because I see how blessed I am, I've felt a little silly or dramatic being so bummed out about this. My life isn't in danger due to this health issue, which is a whole lot more than a lot of people can say. But, I'm mourning the loss of some dreams and aspirations, and I suppose there is nothing wrong with that.
I guess I'm just going to have to learn to love cycling and race that way. That's all there is to it. And I'm determined to be the fastest power walker out there!
